A Fuzzy Navel and the PIP-POP Awards
66The Envelope Please...
Good morning breakfastpoppers. Today is Tuesday, October 12, 2010. It is time for the presentation of the 8th weekly PIP-POP Awards. Today a Fuzzy Navel is on the menu. It's simple, delicious and not too heavy on the alcohol. All in all, it's a perfect birthday choice. You will need 1 and 1/2 ounces peach schnapps and orange juice. Pour the peach schnapps into a highball glass filled with ice cubes. Top with orange juice and stir well. That's it. Now put on your most elegant clothing and head over to the theater. The"winners" await our arrival.
Welcome, everyone to the weekly presentation of the PIP-POP Awards. Please let us welcome to our stage, our beloved breakfast popper, Maven. Maven has nominated, former Vice President, Walter Mondale to receive the PIP Award of the morning. Mr. Mondale please come up to the stage, Maven has a PIP with your name on it. Take it away, Maven. "Sir, it is with great pleasure that I give you this PIP for generously offering our current president some very sage advice. You suggested that he drop the "idiot boards" when he speaks so that he can connect with the American people. Nice try, sir, nice try. I do foresee one problem. Without the teleprompter, our President sounds like an idiot". Thanks Maven.
Our second "winner' of the morning is the EPA. Will a member from the EPA please stroll up to the podium. We have a POP with your name on it. We have been told by a representative from the cattle and beef industry that Americans may have to stock up on hamburgers. Apparently, your organization is targeting the cattle industry because they kick up too much dust in their daily operations. Things like the tilling of fields, the harvesting of crops, cattle movements and pick-up trucks have come under your microscope. The cattle industry is not your enemy and dust is a fact of life. Simmer down, here's your POP and leave our hamburgers alone!
Our third recipient of the morning is the Obama administration. We all know what the deep water drilling moratorium has done to the Gulf coast, but now shallow water drilling has come under your thumb as well. Although there is no ban on shallow water drilling the government is issuing so few permits since the oil spill that 40,000 more jobs are at risk in the region.We are talking about 4.3 billion dollars in lost wages and revenues. Are you trying to permanently destroy this part of our nation? It sure looks that way.
Our fourth POP of the morning goes to the Board of Elections in New York State and New York City. Will the man with the paper bag over his head come to the stage? You still haven't fully complied with the MOVE Act which requires that a state must send its military and overseas ballots out 45 days prior to the elections. You have already been granted one extension and yet the ballots are in jeopardy of never making it in time. Your inexcusable incompetence may have deprived our servicemen and women their right to vote. Get the ballots out, no ifs, ands or buts.
Our presentation is drawing to a close. Let's welcome our final "winner" to the stage. Will the crackpot from San Francisco who thinks that Happy meals are a national security threat come up to the stage. The committee has learned that you are preparing a proposal to be added to the ban on Happy Meal toys that will be aimed at adults. Adult breakfasts must contain 0.5 cups of fruit and some whole grain. How Big Brotherish of you to worry about your residents the way you do. Here's your POP. Care for a Fuzzy Navel? It has orange juice in it!
On that cheery note, let's join our hippie friend from the land of Pelosi and raise our Fuzzy Navels on high. Thank you all for attending and a special thank you goes to Maven for such an artful presentation of the one and only PIP of the morning.
PIP, PIP HOORAY...POP GOES THE WEASELS...
Pop - Another great ceremony! Excuse me while I take a 2X4 board to the back of the San Francisco Idiots Head. Wow that feels better, plus managed to burn a few extra calories, think I'll stop by Mickey D's on my way to the INN Gonna do the 2 - $2.50 on the cholesterol muffins!
Way to go Maven!
Good morning Tom,
Are you sure you want to waste all those good ingredients on such losers? See you at the bar. At least there we have no reason to hurl a bottle at anyone.
Good morning Hmrjmr,
Give the "winner" another whack for me. Be careful at Mickey's, I hear they have armed guards watching all the customers. Eat too much and you have to spend a week with Pelosi! See you later.
Pop - I can see it now, the perfect conservative diet plan, A week with Pelosi, you'll barf fifty pounds off your belly!
On the topic of shallow water drilling, amazing it took the administration this long to do something with that. If they know one thing, they know "shallow". Great awards, as usual. And as for the freak in SF, I have a garden, lots of tomatoes, and a great throwing arm. If you can get him back on the stage again, I've been warming up...
POP: Hasn't anyone in the EPA every seen the cattle drives in the Western Movies? If this is what the EPA has time for, then they are well over staffed. Time to save us some tax dollars and get rid of a few people.
It is only 3 weeks from today that we are voting. NY State blew it already. What is wrong with them? Our servicemen and women's vote is more important than anyone else's.
Maven, you look dashing in your navy blue blazer.
I'm going to offer the Guys from EPA a fuzzy navel, and when they've drank it all down, I'm going to tell them that the orange was not washed first before making OJ out of it! Join me, it'll be fun.
Then I'm off to the bar - please save me a seat....
The last time I checked, the voting process was a rather repetitious task with the prior differences being a change in the names and issues on the ballot from election to election. So, these folks cannot seem to get the task completed on time....I think someone needs to pay a big fine and spend some time in jail. This is near the top of the list on the list of serious offenses in our country. Isn't it rather ironic that the likely voter orientation of the American military is conservative? I would be willing to bet that it would be no problem to get those ballots in the mail if the military was a bastion of liberal voters. Of course, Americans are far too stupid to notice that obvious detail. Thanks Poppy! WB
POP, Another appropriate set of awards. I wouldn't mind if Hmrjmr added a whack or two from me. How stupid can they get? NY is pathetic for not getting those ballots out and if they do I doubt they will be able to get them counted. Another bit of America with the missing DNA of the brain syndrome. I agree with Wayne's more appropriate comment.
Great awards ceremony, as usual. The POP awards given out today reinforce what Ronald Reagan said. "Government is the problem." How many things can governmnets do right? Not many, I think. Good job, Maven. I'm heading to the bar. BARTENDER...........
Dear Hmrjmr,
If you survive!
Dear pcoach,
Just go to San Francisco and throw some tomatoes. Almost anyone you smack will be deserving. After all they voted for Pelosi and will do so again! See you at the bar. Bring some tomatoes!
Interesting award ceremony. Good Job and Interesting hub.
Dear Pino,
Let's sell tickets to the EPA dusty orange event! We can use the money to offset our taxes which are going up and our health care which is going down! See you later.
Dear Wayne,
I think heads should roll all away along the line , from the very top to the bottom. There is no excuse for this, none .Certainly, steps can be taken to get the ballots there and back. Maybe they should put off the election! See you at the bar. I'm mad as hell.
Dear Pamela,
This is about 320,00 votes, no small potatoes. Something must be done to rectify this.We are just like a third world country. See you at the bar.
Good morning taxlarry,
Reagen had it right, government is the problem and too much government is a really big problem. This government is the mega problem of all time. They are inept, incompetent, and incoherent. See you at the bar.
Dear sid_candid,
So terrific to see you at the breakfast table. Come more often and thank you for your comments. Join us at the "virtual" bar later for good talk and friendship.
Just disgraceful what the Board of Elections in NY state did. And I definitely love what Mondale sia. Thanks for breakfast BPop.
Dear POP,
I was waiting your ceremony with great anticipation and I have to confess I am bit disappointed that a well disserved POP was not awarded.
For the second year in a row our signor citizens will not get an adjustment on their checks because “there is NO inflation !!!!!!!!” according to the brilliant advisers that are living on Mars – a neighborhood of Washington D.C as we all know.
If this outrage is not deserving of a double POP, than I will take the POP myself and wear it on my forehead – since I so shamefully qualify as an idiot for believing in and buying into “change”
Dear Tony,
Heads should roll in New York. This is a crime and it should be punished. See you at the Inn and we'll raise our glasses to Mondale.
Dear Petra,
I stand corrected. Would you do me the honor of presenting a POP,next week, to the government for once again screwing our senior citizens? See you at the bar.
The EPA reminds me of that neighbor who complains about everything. Summer is too hot, winter is too cold, grass grows too fast. On a beautiful autumn day she says, "It's going to rain tomorrow".
Pop, grand performance this morning. As always I have to search for most events that warrant the awards, I find it a good thing as I need all the info I can get to be able to vote against the progressive democrat left in a way that bring things to the middle at worst. I hope far enough several like pelosi are removed from their jobs and most importantly I'd love to see pelosi loose her personal jet designed to hall such a vast amount of people and to my understanding it is just her fugly face. Keep up the work as elections are coming closer and I'm getting nervous so I'm headed to the bar!, 50
Pop go the Weasels and Pop; you got some Weasels! Walter Mondale, sorry but he’s still a Weasel; once a Weasel always a Weasel; there’s no such thing as a Weasel reprieve. Idiot Boards or no Idiot Boards both Mondale and Obama are idiots and Weasels!
Hey EPA, simply install one of your wondrous Wind Farms in close proximity of all cattle/meat producing plants and whala-Chazammmmmmm; well Goaaaaleeeeee; there goes the dust
Deep Water, Shallow Water any water; no water this bunch of environmentalist Waccos don’t want to drill anywhere. How do you completely wreck a Carbon Based Economy without banning all drilling for oil? The few more percentage points of unemployment that goes along with this ban is just considered more collateral damage associated with this Regime’s war on the Economy!
The Board of Elections in New York State and New York City will continue to obfuscate when it comes to getting the ballots to the military; everyone knows the military overwhelmingly supports Republicans; that’s why their theme song is:
I’m Proud to be a Republican because they’re who keep me free
And I really do hate those Democrats cause they try to take free from me
And I’ll gladly stand up next to you and defend her still today
Cause I really do hate those Democrats cause they hate the USA
Pop your final "winner", the crackpot from San Francisco who thinks that Happy meals are a national security threat will be hard to award; everyone in San Francisco is a crackpot; didn’t they send Nancy Pelosi to Washington and continue to do so?
But let’s not end on a sour note; the Christmas Season is rapidly approaching so let’s practice an old faithful one!
O come O come ole Rham Emanuel and go with Ba-rack-e-boo straight to hell
For you two put this country up for sale
And drove it straight down through the gates of hell
Rejoice Rejoice O Rham Emanuel; and go with Ba-rack-e-boo straight to hell!
Dear sheila,
I see you analogy and so I say, it's time to move! See you at the bar.
Dear 50,
Just head straight for the bar and do not, I repeat, do not think about Pelosi. She is dangerous to the health of the mind and body. I'll see you soon.
Dear Patriot,
Amen..... See you at the bar.
Morning POP...
I'm pissed...really pissed...Of all the POP's awarded none is more deserving than those cretins on the NY State and City Elections Board...Who are these people..? Under what rock do they dwell..? This is totally unacceptable...Will the MSM hide this under said rock..? What are their priorities..? Insuring democratic enclaves are well staffed and supplied.? Where is the Republican outcry..? Is New York that cynical and morally bankrupt that they don't care..?
I'm in somewhat agreement with partisan patriot; Mondale probably remains a weasel, but even a broke clock is correct twice a day...give him his due...besides, getting the PIP will not earn him any points with progressives...
That fellow in San Francisco has eaten too many Alice B Toklas brownies...
See you at the tavern, POP...I'm wearing the navy blue blazer just for Pino..eat your heart out, Scotty...Larry
I'll have a fuzzy navel with a cherry on top. Great post Pop.
Thank you for the invitation to present the POPS next week; I will be there and trust me, I would not need a teleprompter to tell it as it is.
I am not getting drunk on pure water anymore; I will see you at the bar and we will discus some more
Dear maven,
The New York fiasco is beyond the pale and the entire nation should be up in arms. As for Mondale, without him this week, there would be no PIPS at all. To the bar. Pino seems quite taken with you, but look out for Scotty. We can't be sure what he's capable of.
Dear zzron,
A fuzzy navel with a cherry on top, it is on it's on me!
Dear Petra,
Thank you for agreeing to present. See you at the bar and we'll talk wardrobe!
POP, unfortunatly it's not only NY who didn't get the ballots out in time, seems like there's about 23 states on that list. It's a shame that gov't workers can't do anything right!
You will never run out of deserving recipients with this current crew running the show!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I read yesterday that the Chinese bought a large stake in some oil fields in Texas, so maybe more oil permits are about to be issued - so we can continue to give our natural resources to everyone but Americans.
Good afternoon jiberish,
I realize that there are more states than just New York. The enormity of this is enough to make me lose my mind. How can we accept this as just a mistake? How can we not bend over backwards to correct this? We have to. We have to. See you at the bar. I would volunteer to work all night to get the ballots out.
Dear Sheri,
I realize that you are right. I also realize there probably are a lot of deserving recipients on the other side of the aisle. Let's hope the number is insignificant. See you at the bar.
Dear Wife Who Saves,
We have to really get back to basics and the foundation of what made our country strong. We need to revitalize manufacturing. Enough of the garbage that is imported from China. We need to find energy within our own borders and we need to stop outsourcing. We need to get rid of the unions that are strangling our economy and we need to make sure that freedom rings. See you at the bar.
Just when you think all the bs can't be topped...NY BoE goes and pulls a stunt like this. Reprehensible...of all the votes that should be counted the servicemen/women's votes are pretty damn important! Makes me mad.
I wrote a hub when the happy meal shennanigans started a few months ago-it's so ridiculous!! I guess if they ban McDonalds then there will be less need for hamburgers, therefore less dust and then the EPA can hold hands and sing kumbaya...
I think I'll go quell my anger with a big mac and a double fuzzy navel...
Dear rkhyclak,
It isn't just New York, and that fact alone makes me insane. I think we should hold every single person responsible for this disaster in contempt. As for cattle dust, I think it's time to send the EPA out to pasture. I'll join you in that Happy Meal. See you at the bar.
Great Great show. I think the EPA would go after the wind if they could figure out a way to do it.
Keep on hubbing!
God evening eovery,
I think the EPA has way too much time on their hands. Cattle dust? Give me a break. See you at the saloon, I'm buying.
Good morning, POP. The sun shine brightly as your hub which is always amazing. I start my day with smile while looking at your hub. I hope you always healthy and you always share to us your delicious recipes. Thank you very much. God bless you and take care!
Prasetio :)
Pop I like it when you said leave our hamburgers alone ;). I'm enjoying a snack out here. More food hubs recipes, I sincerely mean that.
Good morning prasetio,
It is so wonderful that you stopped by for breakfast. Thank you for your kind words. I wish you well, always.
Good morning hubpageswriter,
I meant every word, hands off my burger! I 'm glad you "popped" in for breakfast.
bp - With your POPs and your PIPs, you are certainly a whiz!
Just wanted you to know I love your telling it like it is!
Good morning drbj,
Why thank you and I just want you to know how much I appreciate your presence at the breakfast table.
Tom Whitworth Level 5 Commenter 19 months ago
Pop,
An other group of deserving "winners" but instead of of Pops all those "winners" should be pelted with fuzzy navel ingredients of peaches and frozen orange juice and battered with Schnapps bottles!!!!!!!!