A Tangerine Mimosa and the PIP-POP Awards

Good morning breakfastpoppers. Today is Tuesday, January 31, 2012. It is time for the 66th weekly presentation of the much coveted PIP-POP Awards. Today's breakfast menu calls for the preparation of Tangerine Mimosas. You will need 1 750 ml bottle of dry Champagne, 10 tablespoons Grand Marnier, 2 and 1/2 cups fresh tangerine juice and tangerine wedges for garnish. Divide the Champagne equally among ten glasses. Add 1 tablespoon orange liqueur to each glass. Top each with 1/4 cup juice and garnish with your tangerine wedge. Call Fed Ex to have them deliver the drinks to the theater, don your best attire and we'll meet in a little while.

Welcome everyone. I see that you and your drinks made it here on time so without further adieu let's dim the lights and start the show. Please join me in welcoming back New Jersey Governor Chris Christie to the stage. Gov. Christie the people of New Jersey appreciate your candor when you discussed property taxes in the state. You agreed that they need to be lowered but you refused to simply lower them by raising another tax. Instead your idea was quite simple. You said that we had to spend less. Spend less and taxes could come down and the reduction would be real. It takes courage to tell the truth. It is refreshing to hear someone take a common sense approach to a problem. Please accept this PIP with our congratulations.

Our second award of the morning is being presented to the entire mainstream media. The award will be presented and then mailed to the recipients because they all refused to attend. It seems that you all got together and decided to completely ignore the first court proceeding to enter into the record evidence that Pres. Obama is ineligible to be president based upon the Constitution's requirement that the office be occupied only "by a natural born citizen". Apparently this court action taking place in Georgia does not meet the standards of "news" and therefore the public has no need to know about it. The president's lawyers are emulating your behavior because they have chosen to ignore the subpoena and not participate in the proceedings. Mmmmm....

On a brighter note, let us welcome Boston Bruins goal tender Tim Thomas to the stage. We have a PIP with your name on it because you had the courage to refuse an invitation to the White House because of your belief that the federal government has grown out of control threatening the lives, liberty and property of the people in direct opposition to the Constitution. You, sir, have the courage of your convictions and you are a patriot.

Our fourth award of the morning is a POP bearing the name of the New York Times on it. Your newspaper had the poor taste to actually quote retired Cuban leader Fidel Casto on the "idiocy of the GOP field". Your publication is so out of touch with the American people that you actually believe we care what a dictator has to say about the Republican primary candidates? What's next, a weekly column written by Chavez?

Let's conclude the show by once again welcoming back Rep. Alan West. This PIP has your name engraved on it for having the courage to essentially suggest that Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid and Pres. Obama get out of the country. You told them to take their message of equality of achievement, of economic dependency and the enslavement of the entrepreneurial will and spirit of the American people somewhere else. Perhaps Europe would be a great destination or as you suggested even the bottom of the sea. Speaking strictly for myself, sir, when you speak I feel like dancing!

The show is over and it is time to say good-bye until next week. Let's raise our ten Tangerine Mimosas on high and toast all the "winners". PIP-PIP HOORAY...POP GOES THE WEASELS...