Banana Ham Toast and a Fairy Tale
57Repeat That!
Good morning beloved breakfastpoppers. Today is Fairy Tale Friday, January 13, in the year of our kingdom 2012. The kingdom is a twitter because the government has once again acted in a manner that defies logic. Let us prepare our morning repast and meet in the Secret Garden to discuss their latest folly.
This morn we will be preparing Banana Ham Toast. You will need 4 slices of whole-wheat toast, a little butter, 4 slices of ham or Canadian bacon, 1/2 lemon, 2 bananas, 4 slices of American cheese and chopped chives for garnish.
Preheat your hearth to 400 degrees. Cut the bananas into 1/2 inch circles. Toast the bread and spread a little butter on slices. Cut each ham slice in half and place one piece on toast. Sprinkle with lemon.
Now take half the banana pieces and place them on the toast. Top with remaining ham and sprinkle with a little more lemon juice. Top with remaining bananas and cover each slice of toast with American cheese. Place on cookie sheet and bake for 5 minutes or until cheese melts. Sprinkle with chives. Wrap up your strange breakfast and head for our meeting place. What I am about to share with you is a lot stranger than the meal!
Welcome my friends. I have brought along enough ale for all of you, so please help yourself. Ponder this. The companies in our kingdom who supply us with motor fuel are going to pay about $6.8 million in penalties to the castle Treasury because they failed to mix a special type of biofuel into their gasoline.
I can hear you all murmuring that you don't care. The law is the law, but wait...there is more. The special fuel that is required does not exist! Now that is our government hard at work. Clearly, common sense has left the building! The EPA is at it again and this time they have really outdone themselves.
Let me run this by you again, if that's okay. The Castle requires that legislation they enacted be followed. The problem is that the legislation requires the use of a certain renewable fuel, cellulosic biofuel, that hasn't been produced. Efforts are underway to create the fuel, but so far the efforts haven't been rewarded.
I can only suppose that to the EPA this is a mere technicality. Wouldn't it be a relief to see our government perform using common sense and logic? Don't count on that happening anytime soon. Apparently, behaving sensibly is no longer in vogue...POP...
Fuel, ah, cellulosic biofuel
You are what we want
And you got us needing you.
Fuel, ah, cellulosic biofuel
Can't believe you aren't real
We'll fine the companies anyway
Just to see how bad they feel!
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Good Morning Tom,
Fairy Tales can come true, it can happen to you, if you work for the castle and love to hassle... All I can say is this government of ours is growing dumber by the minute. Head for the Inn and save yourself!!!!
That is like charging a toll to go across a bridge that doesn't exist. However, it would seem that the oil companies must be flush with money, so why wouldn't they pay some attorneys to stop this stupidity? Something stinks here. However, the ale is good, and I am going to the inn for more. INNKEEPER.............
Good Morning taxlarry,
You would think that would be the case. In fact maybe it is the case. The only sure thing is that the EPA is nuts! To the Inn. The same rules as last evening apply. Once we are all inside we barricade the doors.
POP: The fines levied on the oil companies will be passed on to the consumer - us. The reason the biofuels are not ready is that the government placed an unreasonable expectation on the manufacturers.
It appears that everything Obama touches turns out like crap, especially in the energy field. So, someone in the EPA wants to levy fines? The Republicans should be all over this one!
I'm off to the Inn. - Save me a seat....
Good Morning Pino,
Yes, the Republicans should be all over this one, but instead they are all over each other. Now Romney is in the great arena getting ready to be fed to the lions! See you at the Inn, where things still make sense.
Pop, I just don't know what to say, sounds normal to me but what do I know, go USA! hump joe public dry! I'm going to the Inn and drink and tell you the one about FOX getting banned in Canada, 50
Good morning 50,
I guess it is normal for this administration. See you at the Inn. I want to hear about Fox.
BPOP - All I can say about any, and all of of this, nonsense we're seeing is "Welcome to the Twilight Zone" where things never appear as they really are. Or maybe it's the other way around. It's hard to figure out some of this. How can you mix something into another thing when that something does not exist? Then how can you be fined for not mixing that non-existent substance into the known substance? Rod Steiger would have a field day with this administration and the EPA in particular. Why hasn't the Lame Stream Media been all over this? WHOOPS! We know the answer to this - "The Anointed One" once again.
The Frog
"Catch 22" is still the order of the day when it comes to the functional side of government. This situation is something akin to a private sector company launching a product promotion on an item that they have not been able to invent as of yet. There's no money in it but in the case of the government there is! You can't make this stuff up, it's just too stupid. WB
The EPA must be run by morons as this is the icing on the cake of many stupid stipulations. I think they should trim their workforce by 90% so maybe they could look at what is really logical and worth pursuing. They were talking about this on the news this morning. Great hub as always!
Dear Frog Prince,
In all probability, the MSM doesn't think there is anything wrong with fining companies for not using a product that does not exist. After all, they are okay with the idea of dead people voting too! See you at the Inn. If anyone from the EPA is there, we'll toss them out and lock the doors. Too many crazy people out there.
Dear Wayne,
If there was any doubt that common sense is dead and buried then the matter has been decided once and for all. Our real life in this nation is the stuff of a situation comedy only no one is laughing. See you at the Inn. We won't have to pay for anything we didn't order!
Dear Pamela,
As far as I'm concerned they could do away with the EPA entirely. They are a rogue department that really doesn't have the best interests of the nation at heart. See you at the Inn. We won't have to pay for food that doesn't exist, that I promise you.
What a revoltin' development this is! All this oil in North Dakota, Ohio, and Pennsylvania untapped as yet but supposed to be in 2012; and the oil-working peeps in ND don't have enough places to live. Texas wants a new pipeline line from the north that will create 20,000 more jobs, but no help arriving from the feds. Now a big $$ fine to oil companies for not using an unavailable ingredient. This should be Candid Camera or Punked, but it ain't!
Dear Patty,
As a plot for a movie, it wouldn't be believable. I do , however, think all of this nonsense would make it into Mad Magazine easily. Scary, isn't it?See you at the Inn. At least at the Inn if a dish doesn't exist we don't have to pay for it!
Little Sister With Giant Brain,
Man With No Pants confused. That like getting busted for DUI in dry county. Fat white man in Washington have strange ways. Where Scotty? Maybe he figure this out. I go to Inn now. Have drink. You join me soon. We talk.
Jim
The EPA needs to have their chief idiot stand before the news cameras and explain the logic of this decision to we dumber than dirt Americans. Perhaps with some explanation and training we would be able to understand how they think. NOT
Dear Big Bro With Tribal Heritage,
Yes, you are confused and rightly so. It's like getting arrested for speeding when you were walking! Head for Inn. Scotty will arrive later.
Good Morning Old Poolman,
The EPA is above explanation and they are not bound by logic and commonsense. We commoners have no right to ask questions. Perhaps we should storm the castle!
The enviro-weenies, including Obama, all want us to stop using fossil fuels, but at this time, there is no suitable replacement.
To put it plainly, if fossil fuels stop flowing, we will all begin to starve within a week. That's how serious the supply really is, and Obama has crippled our own production.
Wonderful hub Pop as always, I totally agree with you about our government. I think common sense has gone completely out the window as far as they're concerned. I am eagerly keeping an eye on this year's election. I am definitely looking forward to some change. That's an interesting recipe by the way, I have never heard of such a thing, bananas and bacon. I think I'll have to try it.
Good Morning Will,
It's all about payback and getting re-elected. It doesn't have anything to do with energy.This latest move is so stupid that it seems like a page out of Mad Magazine.
Good Morning zzron,
It is great to see you at the breakfast table. This going to be a strange and important election. If the Republicans keep eating themselves alive, Obama may be running against himself!
Great Hub. I was unaware of this nonsense. You would think we could find smarter people to run this country. I'm going to help myself to some ale - I think I need it.
Dear suziecat,
You would think that there would be smarter people, but smart people don't want to work for the government. Their common sense and integrity would probably get them fired.
I thought I had already heard just about everything but this news item, bp, takes the cake. I guess EPA really stands for Exceptionally Preposterous Activities. And sponsored by our present POTUS? Why am I not surprised?
Oil companies will pay fines under protest. There will be lawsuits. Other bills will be offered to rescind the original bill. The EPA will issue waivers. Some will oppose the waivers and so on.
Folks, I was in the oil industry for 22 years from the PR side, and there is nothing new about this. They type of do it now regardless of the fact that no one is ready to do it (whatever it may be) is ready. Life will continue. The fines go into an escrow account. If the oil companies win they are refunded. If the oil companies lose, the fines have already been paid. Will they be passed on--they should be. In any business you pass on your operating costs and after subtracting your operating costs from your revenues you have your profits, which are divided among the shareholders, which probably include most of us, if we have a 401K or some other type of pension plan.
This type of fuel has been produced so far as I know, but what's really in question is not CAN it be produced, but can it be PRACTICALLY produced? The fuels are made with sugar cane in Brazil for example. And it can be made from grasses as well. But again, the reality is that what Brazil does and the much smaller size of their country to the United States makes it practical for them, impractical for us. Might I only close by saying we have ENOUGH problems with the price of gas right now. Our food prices have soared which aren't necessarily unrelated to not only corn feed prices, but FUEL prices as well. Stupid ideas like this are just one more way for Obama and his cronies to bring America to its knees. I am sincerely and wholly convinced that's exactly the aim of this administration. Bring America to its knees and have them come begging for Washington to take care of them. And people are falling for it...I just pray they're not in the majority come November.
Dear drbj,
I said it before and I'll say it again, this sounds like a feature in Mad Magazine!
Good Morning Larry,
Thanks for coming to the breakfast table and offering insight into this ridiculous situation. This is what happens when common sense and logic leave the building. Perhaps we should fine this administration for failing to solve our massive problems with solutions they haven't thought of yet!
Good Morning Springboard,
I agree. This administration has done everything they can to insure that our problems multiply. They have blocked every real opportunity for job creation , The Pipeline being a perfect example. They are more than willing to use our money to pay back CEOs for donating money to Obama's campaign. Remember Solyndra! I think we are all living in Chicago now.
Curious, is this the fuel thats being made from lawnmowers and grass clippings? I thought I heard something about yet another scandal associated with that.
Trying to understand it all, it looks to me like some of the science folks at EPA may not have the experience to know what it takes to transfer an idea or 'something that can be done in the lab' into a working everyday technology. That, coupled with overly optimistic hopes, overly optimistic schedules, overly optimistic visions of when something real can be accomplished (anybody thinking 'pipe dreams' yet?) and mid-level adminsitrators who'd really don't have the ... uhm .... gumption(?) to tell their higher-ups 'we can't do that yet', probably led to an understanding at the Congressional level (if they even read the reports the EPA generated for them) that 'wow, we can do this real soon now, so let's make it a LAW'! complete with enforcement agents, fines, lawyer and such who will all feel like they are all doing good for the people of the country.
We can only hope they will be forward looking enough to make it a law to fuel all the governments black SUV's with this new fuel, and no other.
Dear FitnezzJim,
I am not sure how they plan to make this fuel, but you can't tax a company for not using a product that doesn't exist. I think the idea would make a funny Woody Allen movie but it really doesn't play well in real life. But then, what does the government know about real life? Nothing.
Most of you would be amaze at the things government can and would do.
First, years ago, a bill was enacted saying that money spent by a companyng for lobbying expenses could not be deducted as a normal business expense. I worked for a trade group. The dues paid to that group could be deducted, with the exception of the amount spent on lobbying. So you subtract the lobbyng expense from the dues and you have your deduction -- wrong. You see the government never adopted any rules defining what a lobbying expense was or is. So everyone takes a guess.
2. When it comes to pollution control the rule of thumb is to use the best technology available. However, the government never defines what the best technology is, so if you make the wrong choice, you get fined.
3. In Louisiana, oil and gas is taxed when it is severed from the earth. However, oil field equipment such as compressors, drill pipe, various tools, etc. are taxable. However some assessors are attempting to tax the actual hole into which the drill pipe in place. I am talking about the empty space that is surround by earth that is impossible to move, so it cannot or at least should not be taxed as movable property.
4. More than once, the government has come up with plans to require the use of a certain process or product by a certain date only to find that the product or process does not exist. The measure is usually suspended.
The thread that I am seeing in this forum is that most of you, and I am not being critical, are trying to apply common sense to a process that defies all laws of logic and common sense.
In today's world, the EPA will proposed a rule about the oil and gas industry. The industry will usually oppose it, just so the discussion can get started. Often the rules themselves are not bad, but the time frame for implementing them is unrealistic and impossible to meet. The other killer is that the EPA will chose a date as the base point and say that emissions or discharges must be reduced by 30 or 40 percent within three years. The problem is that some companies, recognizing the problem, started working on the issue before the EPA got involved and had already reduced the emissions or more before the law was enacted, but gets no credit for it.
The one-size fits all approach just does not work.
Dear Larry,
If wanting to apply the principles of commonsense and logic to anything the government does is a problem, then the problem lies with the government and its various agencies. This is exactly why I would like to limit government intrusion in our lives. This is why we need to cut through the idiotic regulations bureaucratic garbage and start solving our problems. Common sense died long ago and it is time to bring it back from the dead. See you at the Inn and we'll talk some more. Do you know CPR?
Dear Breafastpop:
Thank you for your comment. We are in agreement that the regulatory climate is out of control. However, with that said, we cannot eliminate government intrusion into our lives because some things we take for granted are the result of government intrusion. I will name a few, you may disagree, but I do not want to eliminate governmental oversight of:
Minimum wage and hours laws
Inspection of imported products--particularly food.
Oversight of new drugs (some bad drugs get into the market, imagine what it would be without some government review)
Regulation of the broadcast airways--that could be a real nightmare.
Regulation of air traffic controllers
Regulation of the national guard
Law enforcement ability that can cross state lines
Management of how our water supply is used.
Child labor laws.
The list goes on. I have seen my share of foolish actions by regulatory agencies. My mother died of ALS. I had her in a nursing home. She needed inhalation therapy. Medicare would not pay for it. They said it had to be in her home, otherwise the facility would have to pay for it. I argued that the nursing home was her home because we gave up her house (rental) and she was not going home--she was dying. The cost of the inhalation therapy was more than the monthly charge of the nursing home--it was impossible for the nursing home to pay it and nursing homes do not (at least then) qualify for Medicare reimbursements. I had my congressman involved and a lawyer. I lost the fight. So I know the stupid rules bureaucrats can come up with but I also realize that if each state or city was left to its own design, our water supply would be questionable, interstate commerce would be a series of giant toll booths and disease control, such as the flu vaccine, would be non-existent. I am all for reducing government, but our first priority should be forcing the Congress to change its rules so that good bills are not amended into bad bills and other good bills at least get heard.
Dear Larry,
We are in complete agreement!
Tom Whitworth Level 5 Commenter 4 months ago
Pop,
I heard rustlings of this story the other day. This stuff is so great one would think it had to be made up but I guess it's real unlike the magic bio-fuel or the feau "Hope and Change" the king was promising again like Groundhog Day only yesterday. Fairy tales can come true!!!!!