Cheerios Caramel Crunch and a Strategy Meeting

Good morning breakfastpoppers. Today is Wednesday, November 18, 2009 and we are in for a treat today. Today we will be preparing a child's delight. Follow along and let the inner child in you emerge. You will need 1/2 cup cubed butter, 2/3 cup brown sugar and 4 cups of Cheerios. In a large sauce pan, melt butter over medium-low heat. Add the brown sugar and cook until thick and smooth. Add the cereal and coat completely. Spread the cereal over sheets of wax paper to cool. Now pack up your snack and let's head on over to an undisclosed secret location where we can eavesdrop on a White House strategy meeting. Crunch away all you like, no one will be able to hear us. See you in a few. Make sure you aren't being followed.

I am glad you all made it. The meeting is about to begin. Let's see 'Democracy" in action, or whatever it is they are doing.

Pres. Obama- I'm glad to see all of you. We have a lot to discuss. I want to clarify our approach to the press when they start asking questions about the deficit. Suggestions?

Sec. Gibbs- Spin, spin, spin. Mr. President you have to remember that we are dealing with a press corps that is friendly to us, for the most part. It's so easy. If you don't want to answer a question, don't. Just keep it up, you know, punting, spinning until they tire and just drop the inquiry. It works all the time. None of these people, except maybe, Fox, has any gumption. It's a walk in the park, trust me. I do it every single day.

Pres. Obama- Our national debt now tops $12 trillion dollars. When health care reform(pardon me while I laugh) passes, 12 trillion will sound like a few bucks. How do we handle the backlash?

George Soros- We don't Barack, we don't handle anything. Don't refer to it. Remove the word "debt" from your vocabulary. After a while, the public will forget. Trust me, that's how we got you elected, don't you remember. All that flack about Rev. Wright just died a slow and painless death. We ignored it and it went away. It's the magic of politics combined with the stupidity of the public. The combination never fails.

Pres.Obama- On my trip to the China and Japan, what did you think of my bows? Did I go low enough? Did I display the right amount of subservience and respect?

Sec. Gibbs- Frankly, sir, had you bowed any lower your nose would have slammed into the floor and come out looking like a salami on a hot day in July. I think you got the message across. America is willing to be led around like a dog on a leash. Well done!

Pres. Obama- How do you propose we mask the true consequences of the health care bill? The impact on Seniors will be devastating. How do I avoid the tough questions?

Vice Pres. Biden- Oh, Barack, that is a snap. First of all, take another trip or two and make yourself scarce. Second, advise Harry Reid to lie, spin, twist, shout and knock himself out, but never answer the question. The last thing we need now is for seniors to realize that this bill will mean" no room at he doctor" for them. I am so thankful we are all exempt from this disastrous bill. We'd all be dead in a year or two! I know, I know, I have to be careful what I say. Don't worry, I am in complete control of my mouth and my faculties.

Pres. Obama- It is getting more and more difficult to dodge the Afghanistan bullet. I don't know how much longer I can put off making a decision. I don't want to appear indecisive.

Sec. Of State Clinton- With all due respect, Mr. President, it's a little late for that. The best thing you can do is to say you are weighing your options and then take a trip somewhere, do some bowing, trash the U.S. and apologize for just about everything. That will keep the people talking and everyone will forget about the war. It's worked so far, why mess with success.

Pres. Obama- One last thing. I don't want the tragedy at Fort Hood investigated any time soon. See what you can do to slow this thing down for as long as possible. If you can pull it off, I would like to blame the tragedy on George Bush.

Sec. Gibbs- Consider it done, Mr. President. Shouldn't be a problem at all.

Pres.Obama- I think this has been a very productive session. I do have one additional request. Once the Senate health care bill is announced, which I believe may be today, can we do something about derailing our promise to post it on the internet?

George Soros- Not to worry Barack. We'll post it and then we will disable the internet. The 72 hours will pass and so will the bill. Remember our motto." Spin is in, play to win".

Pres. Obama- Thank you ladies and gentlemen. Your suggestions have been duly noted, although not in writing, and are very much appreciated.

Okay, breakfastpoppers, this fiasco of a meeting is over. I don't know about you, but I am heading over to the bar. I need some liquid refreshment and a quiet room to contemplate the future of our nation. If you need me, you know where to find me. Better yet, please join me...POP...